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In the primary education stage, (around 6 years of age) children begin to build and strengthen their self-concept and self-esteem. Although not all children are affected in the same way, what other children or adults think of them can influence that construction of what they think of themselves and how they value themselves.
When we speak of complexes, we speak of a certain shame to certain physical or psychological traits that negatively influence the image we have of ourselves. But, What can I do if my child has complexes?
Although it does not always happen, and not all children are affected equally, nicknames or criticisms that children receive are often the source of complexes in children. Having frizzy hair, being red, having glasses, wearing braces, having big teeth, not being as good at sports as other children, having some learning disability, etc ... can be sources of "complexes" in children when other children criticize them for it or give them nicknames, (which can sometimes be very cruel and even, if we do not remedy it, lead to more serious problems such as bullying or bullying).
There are certain behaviors or warning signs that can make us suspect that our child suffers from some type of complex, and we must give it the importance it deserves.
If our child suddenly does not want to put on his glasses, or complains about them, or if he does not want to participate in common activities such as playing with the other children in the park, or going to birthdays, or tells us that he does not have friends, or suddenly one day he tells us that he wants to lose weight or that this or that food does not want it because he is fattening or in more extreme cases he does not want to go to school, he has sleep problems, he complains of being sick when he has to go to school or excursions , is quieter than usual .... All this can make us think that something is wrong, and we must act.
- If your child has complexes, it is important that do not downplay what the child can tell. Listening to our children, their concerns, their concerns, valuing them and giving them the importance they deserve is essential to make our children express and bring to light what may concern them. Making them feel protected and listened to by their parents is key to gradually dismantling those complexes that may haunt the little ones.
- Likewise, the attitude of adults is also very important, and sometimes, although we do not realize it, they favor the appearance of complexes. From home and from school it is important to send positive and trusting messages to children from a young age. Evaluate their achievements, avoiding negative comments such as, "you break everything, you have to be careful" or "you've made a mistake again, take a closer look", "don't eat so much that you look how you're getting", avoid comparing them, "all children in his class read and he does not "or" so and so with 4 years already does this but mine doesn't. Comments that, although harsh, are given.
- It is important that let's reinforce their self-esteem and their virtues, making the little ones see the good things they have, making it easier for them to see and value their positive qualities and accepting those they don't like so much, but also valuing them as something good, because it is part of them. We must educate the child in respect and tolerance towards differences. Each person is unique and it is what children should see, that each one of us is unique and we are all different, and that is a good and positive thing.
We can also rely on books, stories, own anecdotes, stories or even on characters they admire, analyzing their characteristics and seeing which ones they share with them, and make them see that what is positive in others, is also positive in oneself.
The most common complexes in childhood are usually related to the physical: complex of being the shortest or tallest, etc ... or with personal qualities or abilities: complex of reading badly, being slow, clueless, being clumsy , of having different tastes, such as boys not liking soccer but playing with girls, or girls liking "boys 'things" and not "girls', (these are influenced by stereotypes about what boys and girls do or should do).
Complexes have negative consequences on our children such as:
- They generate low self-esteem.
- They limit them and prevent them from being who they really are.
- They affect their character and emotions, making them more sensitive or more irritable.
- They affect your social relationships and your daily activities.
Complexes in childhood can influence not only in this stage, but in later stages such as adolescence and adulthood, so work on self-esteem, self-confidence, and dismantle complexes at this age it is essential for healthy and normal psychological and social development. If parents do not know what to do or how to act, or the situation worries us excessively, we can turn to a professional to guide and advise us on this path.
You can read more articles similar to What to do if my child has complexes, in the category of Conduct on site.